Some of the many species Jeffrey Combs has evolved into:
There are lots of reasons for women to keep their maiden name. In the case of my wife, she had two good ones:
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She didn’t want to become disassociated from her scientific publications.
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She didn’t want to complicate or redo any immigration paperwork.
Also some names just sound better. And some names go better than others with some surnames
Peter File
Who’s a pedophile?
No no it’s PDF file (I know the second file is redundant but that is the trend on YouTube to not get demonetised).
Edit: I got curious and it turns out the file isn’t redundant as the F is for format. Portable Document Format. TIL
My wife just didn’t want to change hers, so I changed mine instead. No need for a particular reason.
My ex took my last name, because he had siblings with children and my family name would have died with me. It was a gift to my father that his* grandson would carry the family name forwards. And no, that wasn’t a red flag – we were married for 30 years.
- Who cares
I’ll admit when I was in my early 20s, it was a point of contention with one girl I was dating. I was young and stupid, my mom took my dad’s name, etc.
But by 30, wiser, less prone to drama, I was solidly in the “who cares, do what makes you happy” crowd.
My wife kept her last name. It’s easier, and less confusing for her clients and networking.
Grow the fuck up. Stop being so needy and insecure. It’s a bad look.
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My fiance and I are considering creating a brand new last name that we both take.
Hot tip, change HIS last name prior to the wedding and she gets the name change free.
I know a couple that waited until after the wedding to do that and the husband changed his name, then the wife was given the option of keeping her old name, or switch to his old name.
She ended up having to go through the entire name change process without the benefit of the auto-name flip from the marriage.
Warning: Taken from decades-old memories of things that I wasn’t involved in or paying much attention to! Anyway…
In Virginia a man sued the state like 30 years ago because they wanted to charge him to change his name, when a woman could change her name free when she got married. The state could either have charged women or made it free for all. They chose the later.
I’m pretty sure both of us had the option of changing our names when we got married and when we got divorced.
This is really interesting, because in my state in Australia, this process isn’t gendered at all. The man can take the woman’s name just as easily, same with same-sex marriages.
I recommend Dax
CONCATENATE([HusbandsName], [WifesName])
Oh wait, wrong Dax.
I’ve known other people who do that.
I just feel like any name change that you don’t need (i.e. you’re transitioning) is just more bother than it’s worth.
Yeah, that’s what we are running into. The marriage forms here in NC make it simple to take the husband’s last name as part of the process, but any other kind of change requires a lot of crazy, expensive, and time consuming steps.
I wonder if there’s an opening there to claim discrimination on the basis of sex.
Even for the woman. It’sa lot of documents that need updating, insurance information, banks… it’s hell.
I got the biggest hassle from Delta Airlines on my stupid Skymiles account.
You can share mine. Personally I don’t like it, but maybe you will.
For someone who gives this much of a shit about gender roles, you’d think they’d learn the correct forms of the word for an intended spouse.
Most people don’t give a shit about the gendered spelling differences in loan words
He’s just copy/pasting what the listener wrote and doesn’t realize the connotation?
I think it’s safe to say that Walsh knows a lot about women maintaining “walls of separation”. Maybe even restraining orders.
It’s fiancée. Fiancé is male.
Today I Learned! I had no idea there was a difference. Apparently they are pronounced the same, it’s only a written difference.
But it seems like in English fiancé is becoming a gender neutral term
So is it a red flag, then, that my husband did not take my last name? And if it’s a gay couple, which one is complaining?
I’m more surprised that he took the time to use an accent mark. Either a copy-paste to make sure he got it right, or lots of extra time changing his keyboard back and forth.
Or you know. The phone just auto corrects fiancée correctly.
Yeah definitely what happened.
If they’re not on their phone (which they probably are as others have pointed out), maybe they’re just a Pokémon fan. I memorized the keyboard combo for the accented “é” about 25 years ago because of this. (Alt+130)
I never interacted with Pokemon (i think I was a few years too old for it) - but I used to have to write a lot of international names down for work related reasons, and therefore eventually had all the accented letter win-alt-key codes memorised - though I can’t really remember them all now (I’ve used Linux only for about 15 years).
I don’t think I’d remember many now - for example, I was convinced é was ALT+0233, but I could easily be mixing it up with one of the others.
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Most people use twitter on their phone. I tend to assume everyone on twitter is on a phone. The vertical screenshots give it away.
My wife took my name, but I would not give the slightest shit if she didn’t, which I made clear to her at the time.
We briefly discussed having a double-barrel surname, but writing that out would be a mild inconvenience that neither of us want.
And maybe this is a dumb question, but what happens when forename surnameA-surnameB marries or has children with forename surnameX-surnameY?
What is the resulting name? forename surnameA-surnameB-surnameX-surnameY? Do they pick one of each, e.g. A-X?
Yeah hyphenating is not progressive at all. And I should know, I have a goatee.
You can’t expect a regressive to understand evolution. They are going backward faster than the rest of us are moving forward.
There are tons of reasons why one might not want to change their name. At a minimum you have to send a form to the state, update any licenses you have, contact your banks, your insurance, your place of work… Best case scenario it’s an annoying hassle to deal with.
Was I appreciative when my wife took my name? Sure. But that’s mostly because we also share the same first name so it’s hilarious to share the same last name. But I told her many times before we got married she didn’t need to do it. I never expected that out of her.
If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.
If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.
‘Why should I have to change? He’s the one who sucks!’ -Michael Bolton
You both share three same first name as well? That sounds very confusing for your peers
My wife meant to take my name, but then we never did the paperwork. So we just left it.
So curious what your first name is.
It seems reasonable for each partner to continue to use their original family name if they want to, even if it’s only the husband’s name on the marriage certificate.
If you go down the legally hyphenated name path, after a few generations, this could potentially devolve to family names like: Jones-Smith - Smythe-Johns - Longbottom-Allcock - Junior III (etc).
I know a couple of hypenateds that got married. They picked one of the 4.
Yeah my wife has agreed that taking my name would be nice, but it’s a pain in the ass. And omg yes I love your attitude. Part of why I wanted to share a last name is so we can be Ms. and Mrs. Lastname.
My maiden name was awful to have. Other people liked it because it looked cool, but it was a hassle for everything even in the US, where at least part of it was well known. I then moved to Germany, where it was just totally foreign.
My married name is under three syllables (vs more than eight), easy to spell, and sounds as German as possible. My husband would have loved to take my last name, but we couldn’t do it the way we wanted to (German naming laws 🙃). I would really have liked to at least have been able to keep my maiden name as a middle name, but alas.
I still feel very weird (about a year out) about it, but there are way more good feelings than bad.
However, it’s really annoying that people now assume I’m German. I put in a shit load of work to learn German well as an adult, and my strongest skill is in pronunciation. That combined with my name means people think I’m just a native German who’s bad at grammar, and they don’t correct me anymore.
I always wanted to blend in as a native, I just didn’t think about the middle stretch where I just seem a bit dumb to others, both because of the language and cultural things that people now expect me to know (I thought it was called handkäse because you can eat the little rounds straight from the hand, no need for bread, until last year).
I have a German surname, but my family changed the pronunciation to sound lest German during WWII so now Germans pronounce it “wrong” and no one else can pronounce it at all.
I read most of my news, so it took about a month to realize the VP candidates last name was pronounced “Walls,” so you’re among company.
I’m from Connecticut, which has a town called Berlin, pronounced BURR-lun (/‘bərlən/). That , like the pronunciation of many German-origin names, was changed during WWII, but it’s basically a shibboleth for locals now, like Houston Street.
I’m in Indiana and half of our place names are pronounced incorrectly.
Ver-sayles (Versailles)
Rooshaville (Russiaville)
Pee-ru (Peru) Kay-roh (Cairo)And, of course, we’re the home of the University of Note’r Daym.
Saint Louis would like some words:
Bellefontaine (BELL-fountain)
Cabanne (CAB-a-knee)
Chouteau (SHOW-toe)
Carondelet (kron-duh-let)
Cote Brilliante (coat BRILL-yunt)
DeTonty (duh-TON-tee)
Dougherty Ferry (DOOR-uh-tee ferry)
DeBaliviere (duh-BALL-uh-ver)
Goethe (GO-thee)
Gravois (GRAV-oy)
Gratiot (GRASH-it)
Hodiamont (HOAD-uh-mont)
Juniata (june-ee-AH-tuh)
Kossuth (KOSS-ooth)
Laclede (lah-CLEED)
Spoede (SPAY-dee)
Tesson Ferry (TESS-on ferry)
Zumbehl (ZUM-bull)
Sounds like L.A., where they like to mispronounce every Spanish name and half the names are in Spanish.
Like Lows Feel-iz (Los Feliz)
Yup, we also add French and German in the mix!
German here. Took my wife’s name because she has publications and I don’t. I have no idea what you are talking about. In Germany any partner can take the others name in a marriage or even have a compound name (maiden name - new name). My father took my mother’s name, they divorced 20 years ago, now my father is going to change his name back to his old name. My sister married her girlfriend, she took her name. Idk at this point it kinda became our internal family joke thing although our last name wasn’t that horrible
I already had a compound name, and we both have middle names, which are the relevant problems to combining our names the way we wanted.
In Germany, you can’t have a twice hyphenated name (not that I wanted one), nor can you use that hyphenated name as an additional middle name, if you already have one.
Ah ok thanks for explaining. That makes sense that although they redid the law that there’s still idiotic shit I it that doesn’t work in real life.
Yet another conservative weakchin hiding behind a beard.
They’re certainly going for a look right now.
It’s the “hardworking man” archetype that they all like to impersonate.
Shaving is work, that’s why I do it infrequently
As a bearded lumberjack-lookin’ MF who isn’t a conservative or a weakchin, these dudes can fuck right off. We do not claim them.
I’m a progressive educated weakchin with a beard. They can’t take this from me. I’m not going back to clean-shaven, ever.
Yeah, they need to go back to having bald faces and side-parted hair, so we can shun them at long distance.
Body shaming isn’t cool
My wife went double-barreled after I specifically told her I didn’t care if she changed, kept, or anything in between. I didn’t want to change my name, so why should she have to?
Twenty years next summer.
Edit: “double-barreled” just means hyphenated.
What’s does double barreled mean in this context?
Just your usual Smith-Jones or Louis-Dreyfus hyphenated name.
I’m not the original commenter, but I think it means hyphenated.
If she changed to your name it would’ve been twenty five
LOL, I like the thought, but you’re confusing “old fashioned” with “time traveler.”
What does double-barreled mean?
What a narrow view. In other many places things are different and they function you know. In Brazil kids get the mother’s surname.
Wait until he finds out about Icelandic naming conventions!
Interesting how it goes?
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Children are named after their father. Child Dadsdottir or Child Dadson. You need special permission from the government to give your child a different name.
I almost kept my maiden, but now it’s an additional middle name. I love my maiden name, but I changed my name to my husbo’s because it has a Z in it and I was super stoked to have a Z in my signature. 😂I also like the way it sounds with my first name.
Sometimes, it’s really that simple. My husband didn’t care either way when we discussed it. It was just a choice I made.
What the fuck makes my name any better than hers? Fuck my name. I don’t even want it.
Take hers!
I tried to but she wouldn’t let me
My wife let me take her name
She lets me do anything
Oh, how progressive! Why, back in my day, we just thrilled at the excitement of folding laundry and baking pies all day. But you, dear, you’ve truly broken boundaries. Imagine—your wife letting you take her last name and do whatever you want! Why, next thing we know, she might let you wear trousers too.
Give her my regards; she sounds like quite the visionary!
Did you try taking discommendation, being expelled from the empire, brain wiping your brother and only living relative, and impressing her in combat during shared captivity in an enemy camp? If it works for worf…
How could she stop you? Isn’t the changed name up to you? If she doesn’t like it, have her change hers/yours.
Well being married it’s less “can’t” and more “won’t because they said no”
It’s illegal to change your name for wedding reason in Quebec (Canada). Something that followed the quiet Revolution and distancing government and religion. You don’t own your wife. You can still pee on her shoes but it won’t be notarized.
Makes “what’s your mother’s maiden name” security questions extra stupid, it’s just my mom’s name.
Yeah, and half the world knows your mom’s name. (Sorry, Just a reflex)
Canadian weddings sounds interesting.
To be clear, that’s a Québécois(e) wedding, it’s not like that outside of there (but would be fantastic if it was.)
Can confirm. Still have my maiden name. Mostly for legality and ownership reasons.
