• pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 months ago

        Yeah right? Running doesn’t clear my head, it just is something I can do that my overactive spewing of thoughts won’t interrupt

        Although when my brain is trying to get me to kill myself running as hard as I can as long as I can does help. It doesn’t make me feel better but it does make me too tired to manically hate myself so I call it a win. Also it’s hard to sob when you need to breathe that much which is nice

        • gerryflap@feddit.nl
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          11 months ago

          When running I’m both letting my brain think freely and listening to music. It’s quite stress reducing, but it absolutely doesn’t drown out the barrage of thoughts

    • LazaroFilm@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Ok, 1, 2 ohh this is heavy, 3, 4, 5, is it heavy or am I weak? 6, no, I need to 7 focus on counting, 8, 9 9 9 9 next is 10! Wow two digits. Yah now I can’t count on my fingers anymore, 11, maybe I can use my 12 toes, but then I’ll only 13 be able to count to 20. And then what 21? Maybe I should use my toes for 22 decimals like 10 20… wait did I miss a number? Where was I? 30? … non oh one more pull, what what number is it? Oh hell let’s go back to 15. Yeah 16 that’s a good spot to start again 15. maybe I’ll 16 do more than needed 17. But at least it’s better than skipping to 30. Ah but 31 if I do that it’s faster 32 to the end 33. Maybe I should do time 35 based instead. How long has it been? 5 minutes, 37 it feels like 37 5 minutes but when you exercise 37 time perception 38 changes and I’m bat at keeping time. 39 and what if I go faster 40!!! Round number again! Yay! Almost to 50 42. Why do we always stop T round numbers? 44 why not ending at 48? 45 I’ll stop at 48 today. 46 but then I will feel lazy 47 maybe I should go to 52 instead. 48! I reached 48!!, my old goal! New goal 52! Come on!! What is this so heavy 50! Ah I’m done. I can’t do this. Wait was I supposed to switch to the other hand? 51 but then 50 is odd I need an even number. This thing makes no sense 5…. What 53? Oh I give up.

      • TDCN@feddit.dk
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        11 months ago

        Omg this is too real. I lose track of counting so easily i often just have to guess where I am at. You literally typed a perfect representation of what’s going through my brain when I’m trying to focus on something so simple as counting. Only just recently discovered that it’s apparently not a normal thing to do

        • LazaroFilm@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          I recently discovered it wasn’t normal when I went to physical therapy after a knee surgery. I kept telling the therapist I lost count, we switched to time based and he would keep me on tempo by checking on me now and then.