• rambling_lunatic@sh.itjust.works
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    25 minutes ago

    Leviticus 21:20 says that you can’t approach YWHW’s altar if your eyes suck. She’s wearing glasses. She better stay far away from the altar.

  • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    4 minutes ago

    Oh look, she’s “reading” Revelations. The lunatic ravings of a man who very well might have been tripping balls on psychotropic mushrooms.

    A shitty, boring sci-fi novella full of meaningless symbolism that is lost on every Christian who bothers to actually read it.

  • blonder@lemmy.zip
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    13 minutes ago

    She would just quote something totally unrelated and then start indiscriminately screaming when questioned

  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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    2 hours ago

    Seethe and Cope liberals! The real men hath return to the power, no more rapist immigrants in Judea! Any foreigner illegally entering the borders of Judea, whether they’re criminal or not, must be maimed by barb wires!

    — Book of archived social media posts from Jesus

    • pyre@lemmy.world
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      2 hours ago

      I don’t like her but that’s offensive. just because we don’t like her doesn’t mean it’s ok to refer to her as such. Marjorie is a titan. Elon is the troglodyte.

  • x00z@lemmy.world
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    11 hours ago

    What would Jesus do?

    Probably beg ICE not to deport him.

    Because he wasn’t white.

  • miss_demeanour@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    20 hours ago

    Found it!

    Ezekiel 23:20

    There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

  • FourPacketsOfPeanuts@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    MAGA: “gotta check the old testament! God always hated those foreign types…”

    Old Testament: “You shall treat the foreigner who journeys with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were foreigners in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God.” -Leviticus 19:34

    MAGA: “dammit!! Well… Let’s just deprive them of rights until they’re so miserable they just leave?!”

    Old Testament: "You shall have the same rule for the foreigner and for the native, for I am the Lord your God.” - Leviticus 24:22

    MAGA: “Wuh?!? huh?!?? Well!! My old pastor said a rule didn’t have full weight unless God said it more than once!!”

    Old Testament: "There shall be just one law for the native and for the foreigner who journeys among you.” - Exodus 12:49

    MAGA: “BUT IT’S NOT THREE TIMES IS IT?? THREE’S A GODLY NUMBER!!”

    Old Testament: “One law and one rule shall be for you and for the foreigner who journeys with you” - Numbers 15:16

    MAGA: “NGGGHHHHH!!! CUT THEM OFF!!”

    Old Testament: "You shall not oppress a hired worker who is poor and needy, whether he is one of your brothers or one of the foreigners who are in your land within your towns. " - Deuteronomy 24:14

    MAGA: “ARGHHHHH!! MAKE IT STOP!!!”

      • FourPacketsOfPeanuts@lemmy.world
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        17 hours ago

        Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a foreigner (Greek: xenos) and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. - Matthew 25:34-36

        etc

        Supply Side Jesus doesn’t know his own book, to the surprise of absolutely no-one

  • lars@lemmy.sdf.org
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    12 hours ago

    Well I don’t believe in body shaming.

    So lemme put it this way: at least Michelle Bachmann was stunning.

  • merari42@lemmy.world
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    20 hours ago

    Oh the old testament is quite clear: Thus says the Lord: Do justice and righteousness, and deliver from the hand of the oppressor him who has been robbed. And do no wrong or violence to the resident alien, the fatherless, and the widow, nor shed innocent blood in this place.

    Jeremiah 22:30

    And the new is no different:

    You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God.

    Matthew 25:40

    • HeyListenWatchOut@lemmy.world
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      17 hours ago

      I mean - if that’s a Bible… it does look like she is at the back - where she’s either looking at Revelations… or checking out the old timey maps they put at the back of some of them.

          • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net
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            15 hours ago

            spoiler

            And a hearty fuck-you too, buddy. Was planning on eating at some point today, but I guess that’s off the table now.

          • elliot_crane@lemmy.world
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            16 hours ago

            lmao… funny enough I was thinking the glasses and camera angle are working a fucking miracle for her in this picture. She looks roughly human here, as opposed to her normal inbred reverse centaur getup.