• some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    18
    ·
    2 days ago

    When I was around 20yo, I spent a summer with a new group of friends pretending I knew everyone’s names. It was anxiety hell. Today, I realize that I can just admit that I forget names and ask and it’s no problem. But that was an interesting summer.

    • CodandChips @lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      2 days ago

      When I first started work I was in shop where there were three Bills, two Phil’s and two Neil’s . I never ever worked out who was who.

    • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      edit-2
      2 days ago

      Bro, homie, dawg, phil

      It’s easy to go years without knowing names, better if you don’t use that last one

  • Bob@feddit.nl
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    2 days ago

    It’s happened to me a few times over the years, but if anything it’s an opportunity to think up a nickname. Sometimes they stick and all.

  • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    114
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    3 days ago

    A month? I’ve known guys for years and still don’t know their names and it is WAY too late to ask.

    • credo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      15
      ·
      3 days ago

      That’s when you figure out a reason to hand them a clipboard and say, “Imma need you to sign in.”

  • atro_city@fedia.io
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    70
    ·
    3 days ago

    For real. Came into work for six months and talked to this dude about a bunch of stuff every time. Only a week ago did I find out his name. Now I can finally say his name instead of starting off with “hey bro”

    • u/lukmly013 💾 (lemmy.sdf.org)@lemmy.sdf.org
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      35
      ·
      3 days ago

      At least you remember names. Someone can tell me their name, I’ll repeat it as suggested, forget it a few days later anyway.

      I’ll remember a phone number before someone’s name.

      Hell, I remember one dude as initials + his age when I met him. I don’t know why. Example: If I met John Doe aged 32, there’s a chance I’d remember him as “JD32”, and forget his actual name.
      Shout-out to MK22, I forgot your name again.

      • devfuuu@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        3 days ago

        I have a friend who has a lot of friends. Sometimes we hangout together, but rarely. I cannot for the life of me remember their names and I swear 3 of them look the fucking same to me. It’s always a struggle to keep pretending for hours until I finally hear someone call one of them by name. I remember that for a few hours. If we hangout again next day it resets out of my head again.

    • Tankton@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      2 days ago

      Excellent point, if you’re just 1 on 1 with someone you dont need their name except to talk about them with someone else.

      • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        2 days ago

        I’m always terrible with names but they do come in handy

        Hey,who’s working ____'s shift Thursday?

        Who do I need to talk to in HR?

        who makes the schedule?

        Ask ___ if they can cover your shift.

        Email ____ for me and see if they have a copy of that report.

        Can you tell ___ to come see me.

    • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      arrow-down
      5
      ·
      2 days ago

      Or to show that you paid attention to anything they said about themselves and didn’t just wait your turn to talk. You know, basic social etiquette lol

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    37
    ·
    3 days ago

    Jfc, if you knew how long it has taken me to know the names of some of my friends, and not just work friends or gym friends, it would be absurd.

    Hell, even after months of hanging with someone, you might not know their last name; it’s all “hey, I’m zipper”. Why zipper? “I dunno, you know how it is”. Yeah, I feel that. Anyway, went a beer, zip?

    My chronic pain/disability support group shares space with an autism support group. Not a single one of the autism group knows my actual name afaik, but we’ll hang out down the road at a diner some nights as a mixed group when we’re meeting at the same time. It’s all “hey, beard!” And “sasquatch, wanna see my cat?” And sometimes just “man”. I’ve known some of them for years and we don’t know each other’s actual names. A couple of them, I’ve been to their house, and vice versa, and we don’t know each others last name at all.

    One guy in specific came over, heard my wife call out my name and was confused as hell because my name sounds like a regular word and thought it was a different nickname. Asked for the story behind it, and I had to show him my driver’s license because he thought I was fucking with him. We’d had dinner together at the diner dozens of times.

    No need for real names when you’re bros

    • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      3 days ago

      After fucking around for a while turned into being exclusive for about six months, the woman who is now my wife realized that we didn’t know each other’s last names. If she hadn’t brought it up it’s hard to tell how long I would have gone not knowing.

  • affiliate@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    25
    ·
    3 days ago

    why say their name when you could instead say “guy” or “man”, or, occasionally, “buddy”?

  • PugJesus@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    2 days ago

    Once sat at the same table as another guy in high school every weekday for six months. We traded less than ten words in that time. Later we became great friends.

  • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    edit-2
    2 days ago

    most names are made-up anyways, and i can’t remember made-up stuff. there has to be something profound about it or i forget it

    actually i have adopted a hobby of just giving people new names (yeah i know it could be seen as disrespectful but for me it’s just a normal way of doing things) and then calling them by that name. yes, it has led to confusion in the past. but it just feels like the proper thing to do. (yes you can call me weird and no i won’t take it as an insult.)

    also, there’s this weird phenomenon that when i make up a new name for somebody, somehow that’s much easier to remember. and if i do forget and make up a new name again, that new name will often be the same as the first time. so there seems to be something “recognizable” or “fundamental” about it.

    • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      edit-2
      3 days ago

      Haha there’s a guy I hang out with at the library and I think he’s great.

      Wanted to invite him to a party and realized I had no way to get in touch. No name or anything.

      For like a month, I’ve been trying to visit the library at the same exact time to see if we bump into each other.

      Library stranger, I hope we meet again.

    • pemptago@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      3 days ago

      If someone I just met uses my name regularly I feel like they’re trying to sell me something.

      • psud@aussie.zone
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        2 days ago

        If someone I talk to keeps using my name, I think they’re following advice on how to remember names, and that they’re bad at names

        ‘The memory palace’ is the superior memorization method