My boss has got very high EQ, but tends to have fraught, tense relationships with our female coworkers (I described it to my husband as working with a mother and daughter who don’t get along- they say a bunch of things that seem nice and also seem to hurt each other a lot and I don’t know why).
She sometimes says passive aggressive things to me, but it always takes me too long to parse passive aggression in person, so I respond completely earnestly. This seems to confuse her without being rude, and she’s just vexed by me.
Actually, passive aggression in general makes me feel very neurodivergent.
I fully agree. It’s not always intentional, because sometimes I do pick up on it (probably the non native language + work makes it just impossible to get in the moment from her), but I almost always pretend not to, and it generally defuses the situation pretty well.
I do this on purpose. I also ignore all the signs that someone’s taking to me “just to be nice”. If you’re nice, then you’re nice. If you’re just pretending to be nice, suck it up cuz it’s working.
My boss has got very high EQ, but tends to have fraught, tense relationships with our female coworkers (I described it to my husband as working with a mother and daughter who don’t get along- they say a bunch of things that seem nice and also seem to hurt each other a lot and I don’t know why).
She sometimes says passive aggressive things to me, but it always takes me too long to parse passive aggression in person, so I respond completely earnestly. This seems to confuse her without being rude, and she’s just vexed by me.
Actually, passive aggression in general makes me feel very neurodivergent.
Honestly this seems like the best way to deal with someone being passive aggressive. If they have a problem make them actually say something.
I fully agree. It’s not always intentional, because sometimes I do pick up on it (probably the non native language + work makes it just impossible to get in the moment from her), but I almost always pretend not to, and it generally defuses the situation pretty well.
I’m also a crier, so the alternative is not great
No I changed my mind next time you should start balling. Like the ugly kind of crying that makes it hard for others to look.
I do this on purpose. I also ignore all the signs that someone’s taking to me “just to be nice”. If you’re nice, then you’re nice. If you’re just pretending to be nice, suck it up cuz it’s working.