I’m sorry dude. I’m in the same spot but doing the sad clown thing because really what else can I do.

I’d wish things to get better for you, but for some people they don’t and I don’t want to create even implied pressure to “get better”. Which in Australia seems to involve a lot of stiff upper lips and bootstrapping…

(A lot of the time people think they’re being encouraging but they’re doing toxic positivity and pushing you until you act in certain ways that they think you should or even hide your feelings. Also there’s nothing wrong with the way you feel. It’s a valid response to some inescapable circumstances.)

I won’t push you to seek professional help. It may or may not be available or affordable to you, you may not be able to find someone who can understand well enough to help, or you may even already be seeing someone. That’s none of my business and ultimately your choice.

What I will do is wish for you to get safely through these moments - if you feel that you can. I will hope that there will be moments of relief when this feeling will lighten.

I will tell you that there’s another person who feels very much the same and you’re not alone.

I will wish for something to shift so that you don’t have to feel like you don’t want to be here.