I am currently undergoing my formal education as a teacher of English and German as a second language, but I’ve been a full-time private tutor for 5 years. I’m not supposed to teach in a school yet, but due to the state of the education system in my country, there was a lack of teachers and I got invited to teach in my former high school. I teach a group of 11 thirteen-year-olds 6x45 minutes on Mondays and Tuesdays.

I felt like I was doing quite well, but today devastated me. We had our second lesson in the canteen (due to lack of available classrooms) and it was a disaster. I try my best to plan engaging, exciting lessons, so after a short vocabulary test they were due to write, I asked them to go around the classroom and ask each other some questions related to our new unit, I even made and printed them a spreadhseet with their names that they could fill out. They started asking each other for the information in our native language, no matter how many times I asked them to speak in English, and after the time was up, I could not, for the life of me, get them to settle. Half of them were shouting and chatting, the other half were eyeing me, waiting for my response. They are generally quite lively, but today was the first time I could not get them to settle.

Now, I never yell. I do my absolute best to respect everyone, just like I promised them the first time we met. However, I asked for their respect and cooperation in return and I can see that faltering. They got used to me, got bored with me, I don’t know.

Initially I thought I would have more problems with the boys, but they are okay. It’s the girls, they mature faster so they are already these moody teenagers. I can’t get them all to do their homework, even by giving them bad grades for it, can’t get them to engage, put away their phones, nothing. I tried interesting debates, topics, but it doesn’t work for more than 5 minutes. Nothing I’ve seen in movies, experienced as a student myself works anymore. They don’t have the attention span. They are under- and overstimulated at the same time and cannot sit still, but cannot do a stand-up activity in an organised manner, it turns into chaos.

Academically, they are bright and have a very good level of English thanks to video games and movies. They do fairly well in tests, but they won’t improve unless I manage to get through to them. I have some rules in place and I stick to them, so I have given them a few bad grades, etc. but I don’t feel like it’s enough.

For information, I’m barely taller than them and I’m a 25-year-old, younger looking girl so I’m not very intimidating. I’m also not mean-spirited and never talk down to any of my students, but I realised I need a modified approach to teaching in a group compared to teaching privately.

I would appreciate any insight or tips on how to achieve a calm and disciplined environment in which I can actually use the fun stuff I work hard to prepare.

  • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    Some good advice was already given here, but I need to add, as a fellow educator in roughly the same age group:

    Don’t let them see you upset. Disappointed, maybe. But if you look upset, no matter how justified, they will remember that and keep doing what upset you just to see how far they can take it because at least that’s entertaining for them. sweat

  • GreatSquare@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    One tip I would give (as a kids sports coach): Instead of starting with every student doing a stand up activity simultaneously, start with nominating one student to do a part of the activity in front of everyone as a demonstration for the others to observe. Once they complete the task, you can give feedback to them or quiz the other students asking what feedback would appropriate.

    Then you repeat with another few students until everyone understands what is expected. Once they understand, you set them off to try on their own and place a short time limit on it initially. Five minutes is fine because they need more guidance. Break the task up. Once they are familiar with the exercise structure, you can go longer time and more complex.

    Don’t expect them to succeed. The point of exercises is to build up slowly from low ability. Give praise for what they got right and make a note of where they can improve.

    At 13yo, kids are still learning how to study or apply their knowledge.

  • Munrock@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    I’m sorry. It can be really tough and stressful planning the next class after a situation like that. I’ve been there.

    One thing I think you’ve probably learned the hard way is that the rapport you can build with students in private tuition just doesn’t work in larger classrooms.

    You say you’re undergoing formal education as a school teacher - is there a professor on your course that you could consult?

    Classroom management techniques will vary vastly between our cultures. The teacher-student-parent dynamic is so different in different countries.

    What are kids like at that age in your culture? Do they get self-conscious about how they look to their peers when they engage with teachers or anything like that?

    With students in my culture, if I’d just gone through a class like the one you described, my next lesson plan would be very dry. Limited engagement, brief explanation of concepts and straight to textbook exercises and dictation. Trust was given last lesson and it was abused, so now trust is withheld. But that’s with my culture. It might land very, very different with your studets.

    That’s why I think consulting one of the professors where you’re studying would be the best course of action. The best advice will clme from there, or from your senior colleagues at the school (the ones who know you were hired ‘early’ in your training).

  • albigu@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    Can’t help with all the other stuff because teenagers are complex. But on the specific point of using the native language, from my experience this could be a sign that they’re not confident enough in their English.

    Unlike one on one tutoring, students can get very self-conscious about mistakes or “having accents” with other students, specially when they’re so young. Instead of insisting they speak in English at all times, try to be lenient when they chat among themselves, but ask them to try and repeat their native language questions in English specifically when addressing you.

    And when doing group exercises, what worked in the past was letting them sort it out privately in whichever language, but then having them taking turns at a “for real” part of the exercise to the whole class. Your mileage may vary.

    I don’t think bad grades as punishment work, specially for homework, but I have no experience in grading. And don’t feel bad for not being “intimidating” or commanding discipline, teenagers in groups are basically immune to that (unless there’s some form of severe punishment which you obviously shouldn’t do) and kids nowadays are even harder to control.

  • CriticalResist8@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    I don’t have much to add but being respected (and getting your class to do the assignments) is a matter of confidence 😁

    Confidence does not mean being harsh or a hardass. This might be lost on 13yos however so that’s why I said I can’t add much.

    But it means that you project an air of being untouchable. I think one way to help achieve this is to have principles that remain coherent. If they know what to expect from you; that they can still ask questions, that they can still rely on you to be a teacher, but that you’re going to hold them to some standard… you will be able to make them see you not as the barely taller, 25yo younger-looking girl you call yourself, but as sort of an untouchable authority figure. Remember that people see you differently to how you see yourself.

    I think we’re moving away from the teacher being a final authority whose word is law and being more of a guide or mentor, getting students to do things because it’s in their best interest, not because you said so. And one job the teacher has is to help students realize that what you’re doing is ultimately helping them, even if you can be tough on them sometimes. But you’re the teacher here and I say this now as an adult.

    Some of the teachers we laughed and joked around with as a kid were the big bald guys, and some of the teachers we knew to take seriously were the 50yo moms.

  • Kultronx@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    i have no experience teaching but from my exp being a student, the strict but fun teachers do the best

  • Camarada Forte@lemmygrad.ml
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    1 year ago

    To me, this sounds like a problem in the relationship with your students. Maybe you can back off a little bit and instead of presenting content from your classes directly, you could spend a class or two forging a better relationship with your students, like asking what they like, what could make the classes interesting, anything that would make them have an active participation in the class. You could research and bring fun activities to do to make their learning more interesting. Try to establish a closer relationship with your students, a personal and affective connection

    If you spend a class bringing them suggestions that you can do and they collectively decide what they would do in the next class, I’m almost certain they would be more active then. If not, maybe it’s the location? You mentioned you are giving classes in the canteen, maybe they get distracted easily there, as it’s not a classroom, etc.

    • cfgaussian@lemmygrad.ml
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      1 year ago

      Just my opinion: this is an awful idea and a death sentence for discipline. Imo the opposite needs to happen.

      • Camarada Forte@lemmygrad.ml
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        1 year ago

        Could you expand a little bit? Why do you think that would be a “death sentence for discipline?” And what “the opposite” would look like?

        I think “discipline” itself is a bad way to frame education. I had similar troubles in my classroom when I gave classes to the sixth and seventh grade, and it was quite effective in the sense that I didn’t have further trouble with noise or side discussions. I took a whole class to ask them what did they expect of classes, why some wouldn’t collaborate, etc. In the end, there was one or two who wasn’t really interested in the classes but needed to stay there to earn government assistance for their families. We agreed that those who didn’t wish to participate could do so in silence to respect the others, and that was it, never had any trouble with those classes again

  • doublejay1999@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago
    1. Explain your behavioural standards
    2. Explain the consequences of not meeting them
    3. Enforce appropriately

    If you didn’t do this in your very first class, you are playing catch up which is hard.

    They are children and it’s no more complicated than carrot and stick, but you have to use them.

    • albigu@lemmygrad.ml
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      1 year ago

      Disclaimer, in case you’re not in on the joke of Ask Lemmygrad; If you want a serious answer, you should probably pose this question in a more serious Ask Lemmy.

      I like how you realised your answer was useless to a serious thread, but still went ahead with it. You might want to consider for a second why people would be less willing to post questions such as these in “ask dotworld” if that’s the general attitude there.