• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    God dammit…as someone who loves absurd comedy, and has had a grudge with clooney since 2001, don’t make me watch fox news for what sounds like a hilarious feel good onion-esque “news” report. I don’t know where we stand in life anymore. Life feels like satire, so a satire news report is just being presented as real news.

    All I know is watching the squaking heads make up fabricated insanity about Clooney sounds like a hilarious watch. This coming from someone who’s never watched any more of fox news than the little bytes they play on the daily show, or John Olivers show. Just clips used for context of their own show.

    • sarcasticsunrise@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Alright, I’ll bite. You mentioned it previously, what’s your “personal” beef with George Clooney? Are you David O Russell or something?

      • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        I was 16, and got out of high school. I used to walk 30 streets, because I didn’t want to ride the bus packed with kids.

        So I’m almost at tower city, about 5 streets away, when everything is blocked off, and a crowd blocking everything. I’m trying to get through, but he’s in the alley, that they’ve since renovated and made a trendy spot, but back then it was just a gross alley. He had his trailer in the alley, filming something on the other side.

        I’m trying to get through, and it’s just this mob of people, and everytime I say “excuse me” they’re like “WHERE ARE YOU TRYING TO GO??? THATS GEORGE CLOONEY!!!” and I do not care. He had been a massive celebrity by this point.

        The whole crowd is facing south where Clooney is, and I’m trying to go west. I get like 25% through this crowd, and Clooney points at me, and a minute later these two guards are now trying to get through the crowd trying to stop me. Difference is, I’m a 200lbs high schooler, and these guards are big buff dudes, like 300lbs. So they were having more difficulty getting through than I was.

        I give Clooney the finger, because what the fuck, and he sarcastically waves like the queen of england.

        Finally I get through to the other side (what should have been a 20 second walk if nobody was there took 15-20 minutes), and now I got Cleveland police on me. They question why I’m trying to attack Clooney, I tell them I don’t give a fuck about him. I’m trying to get to tower city to catch the red line. They let me go.

        But to think Clooney thinks he’s so important that he can just block other people from their daily lives, and try to send cops on you if you’re ignoring him.

        And ever since then I’ve had a grudge against him. And yes, I AM attracted to Francine Smith in that 2006 episode of American Dad where she hates him for being (her words) “a self centered smug prick”. I said “So THIS is what it’s like having a boner for a cartoon character!”

        That being said, I still don’t see the appeal of those sites that draw cartoon mothers having sex with their cartoon kids…even if you draw them as adults, it’s still weird.

        • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          I used to live in Shreveport LA where weirdly enough they shot a bunch of major motion pictures after production was moved there from New Orleans after hurricanes Katrina and Rita. One day I was walking to work downtown and outside my office building I passed a really scabbishly-dressed and overly made-up prostitute (not a common sight there). I kind of scowled at her and she gave me a what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-you look as I passed by and went into the building. When I got to the office everybody was lined up at the windows and they told me that I had apparently walked through a movie set and that had been Demi Moore dressed as a prostitute (it was some movie with Kevin Costner playing a serial killer). They were all kind of outraged that I had interfered with the filming but I had the same attitude towards it that you did with Clooney. Like, why the fuck am I supposed to be happy about a film production interfering with my existence? I didn’t get any money out of the deal, and it wasn’t even a good movie.

          • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            I think this story would be so much funnier if you would have tried to negotiate prostitute rates with Demi Moore, who in turn was confused because her rates for her work were set in stone with contracts and agents. Meanwhile, she doesn’t even know what you’re suggesting.

            And while small, almost nonexistant, there IS still the chance that her husband would have gotten involved. At the time? That would be Bruce Willis.

            I cannot contain my giggles as I imagine your confusion why Bruce Willis cares what price you pay a prostitute.

            • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world
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              5 months ago

              I don’t remember if she was still married to Bruce Willis at this point, which was 2006 or thereabouts, but she was hanging out with Ashton Kutcher in Shreveport because I kept encountering the couple at restaurants and bars. Also had dinner with Ted Danson one evening because he was sitting alone at the table next to me and my friends reading a paperback book and looking sad and lonely so we invited him to join us - he’s actually a nice, normal, friendly guy.