Man City: stripped of every trophy since 2012, fined £1bn

Chelsea: dissolved, newco can begin again in the 15th tier only if they wear strips which say “JT is a racist, embarrassing wanker and so are all of our fans” and made to give Mudryk another 8 year £150k a week contract on top of the current one

Newcastle: literally pick up the entire city including football club & facilites and drop it in the fucking North Sea

I think that’s it for ETH to be honest

Easy one is 25 man squad, max 3 loans out per season. You can send players out on loan, but they’re coming from that squad. No exceptions for U18s, homegrown, feeder clubs etc etc. It’s not a first team squad, it’s your entire player list.

If you’re the 26th player in the Chelsea or City squad you’ve got the season off.

There will always be clubs with more money than other clubs and always has been. But hoarding talent is the biggest issue facing football nowadays.

Good players want to play, and there are plenty of good players to go around. Now, it’s financially better for them to be the 24th guy at City or go on 10 loans in 10 years at Chelsea. This rule would encourage great players - and young players - to stay at smaller clubs, because they would play.