The Hobbit. Probably not the worst movies with not the worst bastardisation (that’d be The Dark Tower for me), but I simply can’t wrap my mind around the overbloated monstrosity that the Hobbit TRILOGY is. Like why would anyone do this, it felt like it’s in the bag, they got Peter Jackson, they already made LotR to great success, why do we suddenly need wacky wheels with cartoon CG goblins in 48 FPS for some reason… It doesn’t even match neither the tone of the book nor the tone of LotR movies.
Warner Bros didn’t want to make the Hobbit. They wanted to make another Lord of the Rings movie, and had to use the Hobbit for it. The Hobbit is very much NOT a Lord of the Rings story, despite the shared setting. Square book, round movie.
Also, they knew there wasn’t enough content, but Warner Bros had to split the profits of the first movie five ways. They didn’t have to do that for the second movie, and then they added a third to squeeze out even more.
“I Am Legend” has been made into 3 or more movies, none of which have anything like the book’s ending.
The Last Man on Earth (1964) is dull and misses the point almost entirely, but almost manages the title line. Not quite.
The Omega Man (1971) is exciting and misses the point even further.
I Am Legend (2007) almost gets it. The vampires are competent. Will Smith’s smarter than Neville of the book, but crazier. But then both endings fail to treat the vampires as a society.
The original cut of the 2007 ended with Will Smith’s character realizing he had been abducting and murdering conscious, aware creatures. The ending has the vampires doing a rescue mission, visibly terrified of Smith, and then he allows the one he abducted to rejoin her society.
Test audiences apparently didn’t like it or didn’t understand it
Test audiences apparently didn’t like it or didn’t understand it
I read the book on a whim in high school. I think it was one of those random Barnes and Nobles finds. The ending was an amazing horror twist, with Neville realizing he’s the monster and the audience realizing that they’ve been rooting for the villain The whole time, and the acceptance of the transition to the new society.
The only adaptation I’ve seen was the Will Smith movie which was generic zombie movie nonsense.
Were the zombies not killing any human in sight in the book?
They weren’t zombies, they were vampires in the book. Like talking, civilized people.
The Lorax
If TV shows count: Earthsea.
It was such a poor adaptation that Ursula Le Guin wrote an article denouncing it.
Ohhhh… Pepperidge Farm remembers. I remember the family and I giving the series a try, and even without it being a bastardization it was a really shitty show.
The Lost World. The movie is nothing like the book.
Dune. The Wheel of Time series on Prime.
I both agree and disagree on Dune.
True, Lynch’s version did the book no justice. But, gosh, is a guilty-pleasure of a movie for me.
I’ll judge Jodorowsky’s version when it’s done.
Battle pugs are a huge plus in the Lynch Dune column
No one appears to have yet mentioned Forrest Gump. In the book he was a chess grandmaster who wrestled professionally and was an astronaut. Also, the book sucks.
I, robot.
Imagine if they did an anthology series… /drooling
For now I’ve got Pluto to look forward to.
Pluto? I never finished reading the manga, but it was looking promising. Is there a movie made or coming up?
There’s a Netflix anime getting made!
Oh oh interesting interesting!
… should I finish reading it first…?
It’s a great story, but that’s up to you! I ended up reading scanlations of it years ago.
Not a classic book, but Artemis Fowl. Disney managed to confuse fans of the books and newcomers to the series alike by adding a McGuffin that was unnecessary, bringing the antagonist from the second book into the movie on the first book, and mangling the relations between the two main protagonists beyond recognition.
Somewhere deep down I think I remember that book as great, the movie has to be horrible
Butler… is the comic relief.
Starship troopers. I say this not because the movie is bad (it’s not, I think it’s exactly what it meant to be and did it well), but that the movie and the book are thematically opposites. The book is very pro military authoritarian. The movie is a satire of that.
World War Z. Not a classic book, but still…Wtf.
World War Z is absolutely a modern classic. You can just tell when people are going to be talking about a book a hundred or so years later.
I agree on the basis that classics are defined by reception and not if they are any good or not, like how Birth of a Nation was for a while considered basically the best movie ever.
Shit-ass politics though.
First Blood
That book is so amazing. The film is good, but it really is a bastardization of the book, which is way more interesting in its characterizations of both “Rambo” (i forget his name in the book) and the Sheriff
The Cat in the Hat.
So bad the Dr. Seuss’s window forbade them from ever doing another live action Dr. Seuss movie lol
The two adaptations of Watchmen have both missed the point. The Zack Snyder movie treats the characters like gods rather than deeply flawed losers and weirdos.
The HBO series is better, and does get very close, but collapses from a meandering plot and glorifying cops
Did it glorify cops? It’s been a few years but I seem to remember the Chief of police being a literal Klansman and chips beating the shit out of people all the time
The show plays into several right wing fears, like widespread gun control (cops need permission over radio to unlock their guns), black people getting paid reparations, white people living in shantytowns (nixonville), cigarettes are illegal, religious people becoming a persecuted minority, stuff like that. The first few episodes play up an angle of “what if cops mainly profiled poor white people.” That’s because the premise is that there’s been an uninterrupted 30 year liberal hegemony under president Robert Redford, similar to how the 1980s Watchmen comic took place during an uninterrupted conservative domination with Nixon.
The glorifying cops part is because it dips into the idea there are some good cops who are struggling against an entrenched structure of bad cops. That’s the whole arc of the show, the main character Angela is a “good cop” who is routing out the “bad cops” in order to repair the structure. It’s the liberal nonsense idea that putting oppressed minorities into positions of power like wealth, the cops, politicians, etc will correct the structure, since the problem is presented as individuals within that structure rather than the thing itself. In the show’s attempts to subvert/criticize corporate liberal dystopia, it still presents the same conclusions.
Although another way of reading it is that it’s a criticism of how generic American liberals, even when granted full control over society, still manage to recreate the same conditions. That’s a better and more interesting reading honestly. But I’m stuck because I know that Damon Lindelof (the writer) is himself a generic rich Hollywood liberal type.
I actually like the show by the way. Jeremy Irons was good. The Trent Reznor soundtrack is beautiful too.
The good thing about the Watchmen movie was that the ads and hype were the first time I’d heard about it, so it got me to read the Watchmen which is an amazing work.
The bad thing about the Watchmen movie is everything else
The worst aspect is Zack Snyder seems to think Rorschach is a cool dude with cool ideas. They made him talk normally in the movie, maybe that was so he could be more easily understood, but it didn’t feel right. He’s supposed to seem deranged. In the comic he talks in squiggly text boxes and in an odd kind of halting, broken English. He’s not bad at speaking English, he’s become so unstable and antisocial his social skills have atrophied. Jackie Earle Haley came across as too earnest or too confident. Like that scene with the therapist reading the ink blots, Rorschach in the comic comes across as pathetic. He’s done, doesn’t care, doesn’t want to live. He says he sees flowers and trees because he just wants to leave the therapy session. In the movie he comes across as like this snickering badass ready to cause trouble. He’s like “heh, you can’t handle my twisted mind, doc.” I hate it. Synder completely misread the scene.
At least the TV show had the guts to show Rorschach would eventually inspire a white supremacist movement
It’s weird because Roschach still comes across as a disturbed weirdo, but he definitely ends up being turned into a more murderous version of the fascist interpretation of Batman.
it wasn’t Watchmen it was Rorschach: the Movie.Considering thr fact that Rorschach is a stand in for the American crypto-fash to straight up fash lines of thinking that inform the superhero genre, its not strange that Snyder would think hes a cool guy with good ideas.
