So, when I read this, I can’t help but think that that sounds like a miserable way to live, going from hatred to grudge to hatred as a continual state of being. Really nothing his actions could cause me to want for him is worse than being him. I wish he could go and get help instead of spending his time taking it out on everyone around him, but he won’t.
I can’t always manage it, like when I think about what he wants to do to my whole family for existing differently in a way his base has been told to be angry about, but sometimes I do manage a sense of sorrow for the fact that he’s spent his entire life like that, trapped in himself.
I spent a while practicing the ability to see / be aware of and empathize with the pain of others a while back as part of an effort to learn universal love. I endorse having done so, and I still think he’s a piece of shit. It’s just that, much like the dog dump on the lawn, he can’t help being what he is; he’s made of atoms that follow physical law. I don’t think that free will is a thing, and I don’t think between his genetic and environmental inheritances he ever had a real chance to be better. Doesn’t mean I want him to have his tiny hands on the power that gives his cold black heart the closest thing it ever has to happiness (the feeling of not just not wanting to throw hamberders at the wall, but the feeling of wanting not to throw hamberders at the wall), just that it’s sorrowful he is that way, and I wish he could get real help for the sickness inside.
I’m somewhere along the same lines, but stop short at not believing in free will. He came from terrible circumstances with a sociopathic father and distant mother, but there are plenty who come from similar backgrounds and overcome being huge pieces of shit, let alone being responsible for countless deaths because of his actions.
So, yes, other people had similar environmental circumstances, but they weren’t the same environmental circumstances, and they weren’t experienced with the same brains. Nobody gets to pick their neural arrangements, and even if in some hypothetical sense you did, you wouldn’t get to pick the algorithms you did the picking with. There’s an infinite regress there, unless you acknowledge that it grounds out in you get the mind you get. Libertarian free will doesn’t seem to map to anything in reality, and while I’m always willing to update on new evidence, it’s been a long time since anyone’s presented anything really novel in that area.
If free will isn’t a thing then why are you urging us to empathize? There’s nothing you can say or do that will influence my behavior in the slightest. Sorry, I don’t have a choice: I hope he dies in prison miserable and alone.
If marbles don’t have free will, why does putting them into a marble maze lead to them rolling? That you cannot stand apart from your mind and reason with some perfect algorithm that doesn’t mean that you cannot be influenced. I’m a part of your environment.
Also, I’m not necessarily trying to shape your perspective; I’m sharing mine. I’m not saying you’re wrong to have that viewpoint, I just prefer the person I am when I’m not generating that as much as when I’m generating that him existing as the person he is, is a tragedy.
That would probably be better for the rest of us, and more likely, but it’s still a sad outcome compared to him recovering from the sickness he’s suffered from his whole life.
I dunno, that shit seems pretty baked in. And if he were suddenly able to gain perspective and sanity, I don’t think that would be a particularly enjoyable experience.
Donald Trump has clinically diagnosable Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and living with NPD is hard. People with NPD aren’t walking around saying “I only associate with the best people and have the best things” and viewing every single experience through the singular lens of how it affects them because they want to, but because they have to. It’s the only way they know how to cope with the world around them.
People with NPD who aren’t born into money like Trump often struggle to maintain employment and relationships. Trump struggles just as much but can throw money and power around to get out of bad situations. Just look at all his failed business ventures and failed relationships. Trump is literally textbook NPD and it’s terrifying he has so much power and is influencing such a large segment of society to be like him.
Yeah, it’s tragic for anyone in that situation. It also sucks extra hard that he’s become our collective tragedy, but the universe is like that sometimes.
I don’t know if there was anyone else in the field in 2016 who has the same mix of traits to do the kind of damage he did to the country. I could be wrong about this, but I think a president Cruz would have been slimy and made the country worse but I don’t think he would have been as bad.
I understand where you’re coming from and it’s refreshing seeing someone have the empathy you do for people suffering with NPD.
Having any type of mental illness though isn’t an excuse or good enough reason to treat people the way he does, or to damage or harm others like a lot of NPDs do.
It’s unfortunate their mental illness can screw up and damage the lives of so many other people around them.
I find it difficult to sympathize with them.
It’s definitely no excuse, which is why I said him having such power and influence is terrifying. If anything, it’s a terrifying reflection of a subset of society who are completely willing to overlook all the horrible things he does, where even one single uncouth allegation or statement would have brought down previous candidates. It’s a huge and upsetting shift in societal norms
“It isn’t your fault, but it is your responsibility.”
Unfortunately, he was never taught responsibility in a way that took, presuming he’s capable of it in a meaningful sense.
Sympathizing with them is not actually compulsory; I intentionally do so as an exercise because I believe that stretching myself that way will lead to better outcomes in situations where I have power over people, but it’s not at all a requirement.
I don’t think he ought to be unhappy at all. I have years of experience as a psychotherapist and am relaying my observations among people with NPD. No one deserves to feel and think like this, they just do, based on a complex interplay of genetic and environmental factors and decision-making skills
That is exactly what I think when I spend time around some of the more conservative relatives. Envy, fear, anger, and ultimately hatred. So much jealousy. Over the years it’s shown me how so much of the suffering in the developed world is self imposed, and helped me change.
It really is both saddening and enlightening. I still struggle with some of these problems, but the awareness has done wonders for my life. Actual effective threat assessment is like a superpower.
Really nothing his actions could cause me to want for him is worse than being him.
I mean…I could want for him to be him…but without the money and influence and power over others and enormous platform to spread his ideas and cult like following and 4 years as the leader of my country.
He’d have to be one hell of a lot closer to a regular person before I ever wished anything positive for him.
I want that for instrumental reasons like, “I’d really like it if I didn’t have to worry about my family being herded into camps because “Joe Biden was just too old” or something,” but yeah. It would be really good if people would get better about recognizing what he is and what it is he’s selling them, like a cut rate Leland Gaunt.
I’d like him to be him with external consequences to his actions. Plenty of people are miserable by their own making. That fact is the core principle of a major religion even.
That said, yeah he deserves the misery he brings himself. His inability to enjoy what he has and those around him is pathetic. A power, prestige, and conflict addict suffering because he can’t accept what he is.
When your life is just given to you, you earned nothing, and you get away with crimes for decades, the world takes on a much more cynical shade of brown. Trump has such thin skin from never having to truly work a day in his life that words literally wound him.
He does, and that doesn’t help, yes. The kind of person he is, is a kind of finger trap: the harder he tries to be cool, respected, etc, the more he steps on rakes, and the more rakes he steps on, the more he needs those things, so he tries, and steps on more rakes.
So, when I read this, I can’t help but think that that sounds like a miserable way to live, going from hatred to grudge to hatred as a continual state of being. Really nothing his actions could cause me to want for him is worse than being him. I wish he could go and get help instead of spending his time taking it out on everyone around him, but he won’t.
He never looks happy. At the rare time he smiles, it’s clear from his eyes that it’s false.
He’s a miserable old man and, regardless of the outcome of the election, he will die miserable.
I can’t always manage it, like when I think about what he wants to do to my whole family for existing differently in a way his base has been told to be angry about, but sometimes I do manage a sense of sorrow for the fact that he’s spent his entire life like that, trapped in himself.
I have absolutely no sympathy for him. He’s a rapist, he’s a bigot, he’s a traitor, he’s a tax cheat. And there are so many other reasons.
Donald Trump does not deserve happiness.
I spent a while practicing the ability to see / be aware of and empathize with the pain of others a while back as part of an effort to learn universal love. I endorse having done so, and I still think he’s a piece of shit. It’s just that, much like the dog dump on the lawn, he can’t help being what he is; he’s made of atoms that follow physical law. I don’t think that free will is a thing, and I don’t think between his genetic and environmental inheritances he ever had a real chance to be better. Doesn’t mean I want him to have his tiny hands on the power that gives his cold black heart the closest thing it ever has to happiness (the feeling of not just not wanting to throw hamberders at the wall, but the feeling of wanting not to throw hamberders at the wall), just that it’s sorrowful he is that way, and I wish he could get real help for the sickness inside.
I’m somewhere along the same lines, but stop short at not believing in free will. He came from terrible circumstances with a sociopathic father and distant mother, but there are plenty who come from similar backgrounds and overcome being huge pieces of shit, let alone being responsible for countless deaths because of his actions.
So, yes, other people had similar environmental circumstances, but they weren’t the same environmental circumstances, and they weren’t experienced with the same brains. Nobody gets to pick their neural arrangements, and even if in some hypothetical sense you did, you wouldn’t get to pick the algorithms you did the picking with. There’s an infinite regress there, unless you acknowledge that it grounds out in you get the mind you get. Libertarian free will doesn’t seem to map to anything in reality, and while I’m always willing to update on new evidence, it’s been a long time since anyone’s presented anything really novel in that area.
If free will isn’t a thing then why are you urging us to empathize? There’s nothing you can say or do that will influence my behavior in the slightest. Sorry, I don’t have a choice: I hope he dies in prison miserable and alone.
If marbles don’t have free will, why does putting them into a marble maze lead to them rolling? That you cannot stand apart from your mind and reason with some perfect algorithm that doesn’t mean that you cannot be influenced. I’m a part of your environment.
Also, I’m not necessarily trying to shape your perspective; I’m sharing mine. I’m not saying you’re wrong to have that viewpoint, I just prefer the person I am when I’m not generating that as much as when I’m generating that him existing as the person he is, is a tragedy.
I for one hope he is miserable every moment for the rest of his life.
I wish his anger would consume him and his entire body and he ends up all shriveled up like Voldemort in that one scene.
That would probably be better for the rest of us, and more likely, but it’s still a sad outcome compared to him recovering from the sickness he’s suffered from his whole life.
I dunno, that shit seems pretty baked in. And if he were suddenly able to gain perspective and sanity, I don’t think that would be a particularly enjoyable experience.
I’m not advocating for a Total Perspective Vortex experience for him here. I agree though that it’s not going to get better.
Donald Trump has clinically diagnosable Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and living with NPD is hard. People with NPD aren’t walking around saying “I only associate with the best people and have the best things” and viewing every single experience through the singular lens of how it affects them because they want to, but because they have to. It’s the only way they know how to cope with the world around them.
People with NPD who aren’t born into money like Trump often struggle to maintain employment and relationships. Trump struggles just as much but can throw money and power around to get out of bad situations. Just look at all his failed business ventures and failed relationships. Trump is literally textbook NPD and it’s terrifying he has so much power and is influencing such a large segment of society to be like him.
Yeah, it’s tragic for anyone in that situation. It also sucks extra hard that he’s become our collective tragedy, but the universe is like that sometimes.
If Trump had never existed wouldn’t it have been someone else to fill his role though?
I don’t know if there was anyone else in the field in 2016 who has the same mix of traits to do the kind of damage he did to the country. I could be wrong about this, but I think a president Cruz would have been slimy and made the country worse but I don’t think he would have been as bad.
I understand where you’re coming from and it’s refreshing seeing someone have the empathy you do for people suffering with NPD. Having any type of mental illness though isn’t an excuse or good enough reason to treat people the way he does, or to damage or harm others like a lot of NPDs do. It’s unfortunate their mental illness can screw up and damage the lives of so many other people around them. I find it difficult to sympathize with them.
It’s definitely no excuse, which is why I said him having such power and influence is terrifying. If anything, it’s a terrifying reflection of a subset of society who are completely willing to overlook all the horrible things he does, where even one single uncouth allegation or statement would have brought down previous candidates. It’s a huge and upsetting shift in societal norms
“It isn’t your fault, but it is your responsibility.”
Unfortunately, he was never taught responsibility in a way that took, presuming he’s capable of it in a meaningful sense.
Sympathizing with them is not actually compulsory; I intentionally do so as an exercise because I believe that stretching myself that way will lead to better outcomes in situations where I have power over people, but it’s not at all a requirement.
This is a perfect example of the Just World Fallacy in action.
Just because you think he ought to be unhappy it doesn’t mean he is.
I don’t think he ought to be unhappy at all. I have years of experience as a psychotherapist and am relaying my observations among people with NPD. No one deserves to feel and think like this, they just do, based on a complex interplay of genetic and environmental factors and decision-making skills
…everyone around him being the entire country and then some, given the power this country has.
Yup. It used to be a much smaller set, but then as a country we put him in office.
On reflection, that has turned out to be a poor decision on America’s part. I hope we continue to do better.
That is exactly what I think when I spend time around some of the more conservative relatives. Envy, fear, anger, and ultimately hatred. So much jealousy. Over the years it’s shown me how so much of the suffering in the developed world is self imposed, and helped me change.
It really is both saddening and enlightening. I still struggle with some of these problems, but the awareness has done wonders for my life. Actual effective threat assessment is like a superpower.
I mean…I could want for him to be him…but without the money and influence and power over others and enormous platform to spread his ideas and cult like following and 4 years as the leader of my country.
He’d have to be one hell of a lot closer to a regular person before I ever wished anything positive for him.
I want that for instrumental reasons like, “I’d really like it if I didn’t have to worry about my family being herded into camps because “Joe Biden was just too old” or something,” but yeah. It would be really good if people would get better about recognizing what he is and what it is he’s selling them, like a cut rate Leland Gaunt.
I’d like him to be him with external consequences to his actions. Plenty of people are miserable by their own making. That fact is the core principle of a major religion even.
That said, yeah he deserves the misery he brings himself. His inability to enjoy what he has and those around him is pathetic. A power, prestige, and conflict addict suffering because he can’t accept what he is.
When your life is just given to you, you earned nothing, and you get away with crimes for decades, the world takes on a much more cynical shade of brown. Trump has such thin skin from never having to truly work a day in his life that words literally wound him.
It must be bad, yes, but it doesn’t help that the draws the ire of others to himself
He does, and that doesn’t help, yes. The kind of person he is, is a kind of finger trap: the harder he tries to be cool, respected, etc, the more he steps on rakes, and the more rakes he steps on, the more he needs those things, so he tries, and steps on more rakes.