Hi everyone it’s me President Trump introducing the only official Trump Sandwich. It’s got everything a sandwich should be with the outstanding quality you expect, you’re truly going to love it. It’s like luxury in your mouth I tell you, and look at this deal. I know you’re thinking, “only this much for a sandwich? How can it be good? Well let me tell you, we have a great deal here that you’ll only find through my official Trump brand.” People are saying it’s probably the best sandwich they’ve ever had, good people say this, people who love sandwiches, people who eat sandwiches every day… we love sandwiches don’t we? Yes we love em! We love the sandwiches!! And now you’re gonna love my sandwich, I know you are. I can’t wait til you and all your loved ones try it, it’s going to be so great, and it makes me so happy to share it with you.
Hi everyone it’s me President Trump introducing the only official Trump Sandwich. It’s got everything a sandwich should be with the outstanding quality you expect, you’re truly going to love it. It’s like luxury in your mouth I tell you, and look at this deal. I know you’re thinking, “only this much for a sandwich? How can it be good? Well let me tell you, we have a great deal here that you’ll only find through my official Trump brand.” People are saying it’s probably the best sandwich they’ve ever had, good people say this, people who love sandwiches, people who eat sandwiches every day… we love sandwiches don’t we? Yes we love em! We love the sandwiches!! And now you’re gonna love my sandwich, I know you are. I can’t wait til you and all your loved ones try it, it’s going to be so great, and it makes me so happy to share it with you.
Sorry, way too coherent to be believable.
NOT ENOUGH CAPS. SAD!