Takes a vegan to take a general statement and make it about their pet issue. I thought you guy were forbidden to have pets? Whatever happened to that?

Tell the waiter “I’m vegan, what can you recommend”, be served oilve oil brioche and a nice, round, black coffee. With a slight sweetness and aroma to it, chosen to specifically to complement that of the brioche. It could have been so nice, everyone could have been happy, you could have not been a philistine.