X screenshot that says “Oh my god did you see the latest poll? Pennsylvania is within the marg-”
You bolt awake. The year is 1656. You summon a servant, sure of what must be done. You are Oliver Cromwell, Lord Protector of the Commonwealth. And William Penn must die.
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Imagine how much better the world would have been if Cromwell wasn’t such a murderous religious zealot and just loved killing kings.
If he hadn’t banned Christmas, genocided the Irish and trained a worthy successor Britain would quite easily remained a republic with, for the time, pretty progressive governance
And if my grandmother had wheels, she’d be a bicycle.
And if a frog had side pockets, he’d carry a handgun.
I didn’t know frogs were conservatives, no wonder Jones was so worried about the guvment turning them gay.
Waking up as one of the worst people in history certainly does sound unappealing. And by worst I mean he both did a genocide and banned Christmas.
This is the first time I’ve conceptualized how much more stressful the second situation would be. I’d definitely be hanged for making eye contact with the queen or forgetting to discriminate against Irish people or something.
to answer the rhetorical question in the title nittany is a (small) mountain near penn state college, where there used to be mountain lions:
