The real joke is the ceo admitting fault. You can always blame “the market”, “inflation” and “lackluster employee performance”!
Or the new one: “rightsizing”
If I hear the word rightsizing come out of my boss’ mouth, that mouth is immediately losing a few teeth. I would legitimately prefer the boss in this comic, because at least they’re honest.
I genuinely respect when people own up to their mistakes.
I’d greatly prefer a boss who says “look, this isn’t your fault, I wish I could do better by you, but it was my job to protect your job and this is where we are. Absolutely use me as a reference, reach out to me if I can do anything to help you land on your feet”
People really hate when something unfair happens and you try to pin it on them… But when you put down the titles, explain why it’s come to this, and offer to help them find a new job? That’s how you don’t burn the bridge from the other side… It doesn’t even require you to actually take responsibility, you just have to acknowledge it’s not their fault and make them feel you’re not taking it lightly
I have seen a pattern of the boss or even second-tier management not even knowing it’s about to happen. Like the now-famous Cloudflare botched “layoff-not-a-layoff” decisions are being made by folks who probably don’t even know the people they are firing, they are just names on a spreadsheet.
The good managers I’ve worked for think this way, they are there to make their team better and actually care about them as humans. For anyone thinking about going into management, every business I’ve ever seen needs more managers that care, it’s a worthwhile job and even fewer people can do it correctly than many technical jobs. Managing poorly is trivial, so we all think it’s “easy”.
Yeah, at this point, the boss in the comic would be massive improvement over most tech CEOs. Corporate doublespeak is more infuriating than just being a fuckup
over most
techCEOs.Let’s not leave the other CEOs out of this.
Wow so manly swoon
I wish my workplace would rightsize the workload
“I take full responsibility. You’re fired.”
"I don’t understand! This is the 5th company I’ve owned that has failed! Why can’t I find the right people?!?!?!’
fifth panel: Have fun doing the work of 3 people
Sixth panel: btw the board has rewarded me for the downsizing and gave me a raise
And that’s where it becomes unrealistic.
Edit: I was dumb. I thought you were talking about the employees.
I think the boss got a raise/bigger bonus, not the employee. Then it’s very realistic (:
I wish it was.
Can’t believe this was left out.
I love being told that “we” need to tighten our belts by an executive that gets millions upon millions in total compensation.
Our CIO who recently retired was often famous for justifying low/no raises or bonuses by saying “Well, money isn’t everything” and yet still buying an airplane to casually fly
Buying a plane can be a lot cheaper than you think, to be fair.
How many do you have?
I have other expensive hobbies. But you can buy an airworthy aircraft for well under 100k.
Does it mean I could get an airunworthy aircraft for cheaper?!
I think you missed the point.
But now the security guard has work to do, they’re creating jobs!
I’ve only seen four or five of these comics and each one of them is funnier than anything Scott Adams ever put out.
Cloudflare.
Some of you will be laid off, but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.
I should become security, they are always there still working when the firings happens.
They have the same problem as IT.
We don’t have any security issues. What do we pay you for?
We have security issues. What do we pay you for?
Yeah sure, I was just joking.
“No, I don’t know who broke your car’s windows. I don’t work for you anymore, stop hassling me.”
And by, “the” I mean, “my”.
The buck stops here.
And by buck I mean money - what did you think I meant, responsibility? HAHAHAHAH! :-P [sob]
