“With the near trillion dollar sell-off on the Nasdaq alone earlier yesterday, the rapid devaluing of assets has allowed the American public unparalleled access to cheap stocks and shares on the market.”
Economic spokesman for the White House, Chuck Williams, claimed, “People use words like slump, looming economic depression, lowest recorded IQ of any president ever, as though they’re bad things.
I wish I could buy stocks right now…
You still can afford to buy socks. That’s almost the same, just a letter of difference.
deleted by creator
We have no idea how far the market will crash.
No one is stopping you.
I can’t just buy in an impulse. I need to study before doing so.
EutelSat, and the European MIC just got a $800b investment. Also, NANC and KRUZ might work. They follow the stock actions of major politicians like Pelosi, though dated by 30-60ish days IIRC. You won’t be quite on top of things with them, but at least you will be imitating the moves of the most informed fish.
…mind, if the market tanks, buying and selling might move too quickly for NANC and Kruz to be useful.
Study what exactly?
To be fair you shouldn’t just be buying stocks and shares randomly. But there is loads of easily available info on ETFs.
Yes, global all cap index is the way to go.
Give it two more weeks and everybody will be able to!
i always fall down with laughter when u guys do stuff like this!
Please keep it up!
It’s true though, there’s a fire sale going on.
There’s a falling knife going on, with the floor nowhere near.
Caught this one right away when they used “philanthropist” and “Trump” in the same sentence, and it wasn’t “Trump is not a philanthropist”.
Good to see a bona fide Onion article instead of the ‘we have the Onion at home’ slop every other media outlet has been pushing lately. Brings a tear to the eye.