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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 on 2024-09-16 04:02:05+00:00.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/russodoll86

My(m24) Girlfriend(f25) mother(f55) took my Transformer toys to give to her grandson.

Originally posted to r/relationship_advice

TRIGGER WARNING theft

MOOD SPOILER: frustrating

Original Post  Nov 16, 2022

My relationship with my GF’s mother has recently turned sour after she took my transformer toys from my flat to give to her grandson. She has refused to give them back, saying that someone in their 20s shouldn’t have toys in their flat. The issue is that they are collectables in addition to toys. Since the majority of them date to the1980s, their combined value is estimated to be roughly $10- $11k. (Haven’t gotten them appraised but that is what I’ll put down if I make the report) I informed her of their value, but she brushed it aside by stating, “Well, they’re just toys.” I even told her I’ll go to the store to pick some toys for her grandson but she doesn’t want that and refused by saying “they don’t make em like they used to”.

My girlfriend and I have spoken about this, but she doesn’t want to become involved and prefers that I handle it on my own. I told her that I have exhausted all options and that the next logical step is probably to report the items as stolen.

Stealing something worth 10k isn’t a misdemeanour either, this is felony level theft. Additionally, the mother took them by entering my flat using my GF’s key. My girlfriend said she would speak to her mother and ask her not to do anything similar ever again, but that I should let this one go and not escalate the matter because if I reported it, we would be done. She said she would only talk and involve herself if I promise to not do anything about it and I should value our 2.5 year relationship more than some plastic toys. I don’t understand why she isn’t valuing our relationship and getting my stuff back from her family.

I just want my things returned. I genuinely find it hard to believe she is siding with her mother. We’ve already been into a few arguments over this over the past several days, and I don’t think things will get better. A part of me believes that her mother will likely sell them for a profit or something, and then purchase the cheaper ones for her grandson to give to him on his sixth birthday.

I don’t want to involve the police and ruin my relationship with my GF or her mother. Up until now, her mother has been nothing but nice to me.

Is there a more effective approach to take?

Advice?

RELEVANT COMMENTS

OOP when told to go over and get them back

Get them how? I don’t know where they are? Most probably in their house but I don’t think she will let me search her house for my stuff. Asking for it hasn’t worked.

airplane_porn

Hang the fuck on…

She can enter your house to steal your shit…

But she won’t let you into her house to get your stolen property back?!?!

Bro I can’t fuckin even!!! GTFOH!

Tell your gf to take you over there and let you in and look for your shit.

Also, said child recipient of your stolen property is a relation to your girlfriend. Tell her to get you in touch with that child’s family so they can return your stolen property.

If your girlfriend won’t do either, then she’s morally complicit in you being robbed!

~

KingAlastor

Sure you want to be with a girlfriend who supports her mother in theft? Instead of just going and taking those toys and bringing them back to you?

OOP

I see what you’re saying, but other than this one thing rest has been good.

LimitlessMegan

Here’s the thing. Her mother let herself into your home to intentionally steal from you.

But she’s not going to say anything. She’s hit taking the key back. She’s not demanding the things get returned. She’s doing nothing.

And she will punish you if you do the ONE thing you have left to do.

Basically, your girlfriend is helping her mom steal from you. And I’m guessing agrees with her mom about your “toys”. Are you sure your gf want in in them being taken?

And why is it ok for her to throw your 2.5 year relationship away so get mom can literally steal from you. And why would you want to preserve a relationship with someone who thinks so little of you, your feelings and your belongings?

Update - rareddit  Nov 23, 2022

I broke up with my GF because she continued to take her mom’s side and threatened to break up with me. Police report has also been filed. Wrote down the estimated value to be 13k when the police asked me for it. Fingers crossed now.

RELEVANT COMMENTS

Queenslily

Don’t forget to get your lock changed

OOP

Already asked the building manager to do that. They should get changed by the end of the week

~

EmbarrassedHelp

Does the theft of $10k+ worth of stuff increase the potential charges that the girlfriend’s mom could face?

Not to mention that they may become damaged while in her possession, if she doesn’t try to sell them

OOP

According to the police, Yes. That is why they asked me to add 3k to my estimation. They would have to be appraised once retrieved tho for charges to be pressed.

~

Mundane-Currency5088

Everything will be out of the box now. No way a kid understands value. Unless she sold them to collectors in which case she will have to pay you for them

OOP

She hasn’t given them to him yet. She is waiting for his birthday which is in a few days. I suspect she won’t give them to him now after knowing what they are worth and will try to sell them for profit

Final Update  June 23, 2024 (2 years later)

Hello everyone.

I wanted to give you an update about my Transformers collection that was stolen by my ex’s mother. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to recover any of them, but we settled for 7K. This amount is definitely less than what I believe was fair, but at this point, I’m ready to move on.

The past two years have been incredibly tough, and I just want to put this behind me. Thank you all for your support; it meant a lot to me when I needed it the most.

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP

DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP’s OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7